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Published by MARIE KAUFMAN | Saturday, August 14, 2010 11:53 PM
BR 100 Word Contest
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I think the line "your pale feet, slipped delicately into the skin of my country, distract" is fantastic! I think it's interesting how you create this sense of travel and movement that carries throughout the story and yet, simultaneously, there is this suspension of that movement and time as the stories are discussed and they sit over coffee. Very nice!
I love how you say, "we discuss my writing. Yours. My children. Yours. My wife." And as readers, we're looking for "Yours" and by withholding, you add another layer into the depth of this relationship. Love it, Marie!
I find it interesting that this story has several references to the five senses. My favorite line is " Our time together seeps quickly into dark soil of blue flowers." I love the image of blue flowers. Great job.
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