Cornelia is an Arts and Letters member of the National League of American Pen Women Honolulu.
She is the recognized author of Letters to a Prisoner by Connie D.
Letters… is just one of her six poetry and photography books
including: one Fine Art Photography book titled Fire Dance
and one Anthology–Saturdays with Lillian.
You can find her fine art prints on Fine Art America.com.
Overcoming and moving beyond an addiction
You know maybe it’s just me
but I don’t need to walk around
with a heavy sign around my neck
that says I am a recovering cigarette smoker
that it has been twenty years since my last drag.
I don’t need to go to meetings
or confess my cravings
which I honestly don’t remember.
I don’t need the pat on the back
or the camaraderie of fellow ex-smokers
to get through another day.
I sent that bitch packing.
I buried it
said a few words
and left it to rot
where it belongs.
I didn’t look back.
it soiled my lungs, hair
It yellowed my teeth
wrinkled my face, turned me into a liar
and a sneak. It made me miss out
on special times with friends and family.
It was a selfish, conceited bully.
It made me believe
all sorts of lies.
It was never satisfied
more and more of my attention.
It had me fooled
spun me up like a top.
I forgot about food, I lived on diet soda and one meal a day.
It was the first thing I reached for in the morning
and the last thing at night.
I woke up to its trickery
I slowly learned that
I had other choices
that I didn’t have to be a victim
or a hostage
to this friend.
So I quit that habit
for the cheat that it was
and suddenly food tasted better.
and my breath smelled cleaner, sweeter
attracting positive friends
like health and fitness.
It brought things like
memory into sharper focus
reversed the damage to my lungs
gave me a life free from chronic bronchitis
made my immune system
more resistant to infection
and speeded healing.
My so-called friend
had been killing me inch by inch
guaranteeing me a
one-way express ticket
to the dirt and ash concert
but I decided to postpone
I know that time
will come soon enough.
In the meantime
I have too much to do
too many things to experience
so many doors to open
reawakening the child within
reminding me of
simplicity and common sense
of how things used to be and
could be again, if I just let it be.
beyond my comfort zone
way past where
any of my old friends
had ever gone
or will ever go.